Dating someone with add
And so, with a feeling of dare I say , responds to my interview request right away — an early sign that she gets the urgency and distractedness of someone with ADHD.
Tschudi is, perhaps, the most perfect expert on this topic.
No new person is ever going to assume any of that about me, though, because there’s no basis for the assumption.
My storytelling style is the reason I was blindsided by the news that — even though I learned a person’s entire dating history, favorite pastime details, favorite post-punk Seattle all-girl bands, parental relationship details, desired first tattoo (design and location), religious belief progression, and favorite animals at the zoo (among other conversation topics) — I somehow dominated the conversation.
I assumed that talking was a personality flaw — something I couldn’t control because it was a negative part of who I was. Or, really, ‘pre-bored’ because at this point my brain automatically compensates before I actually Having laid out the problems, I need solutions. Moving Forward Despite my severe ADHD, I’m very task-oriented. Nadeau encourages me to use humor to warn new people that I might get distracted or entertain a tangent.
I couldn’t find a middle ground, so I just stopped talking. She also suggests I use self-talk; for instance, by saying something to myself like, .
Tschudi breaks down the types of unintentional behaviors that can make us look uninterested in the other person.“My daughter would do the ‘squirrel thing’ — anything that caught her eye, she’d look away during one-on-one conversation,” she says.
“A friend of hers very kindly said, ‘You don’t seem to be very interested in what I’m trying to talk to you about.’ And she was interested!
Luckily, I get some reassurance about this: “This is absolutely not about who you are or what kind of person you are,” she says.
This piece is Katie’s Klabusich’s second dispatch from the front lines of her romantic life for the #Its Totally Me dating series, which follows Establishment writers Klabusich and Wagatwe Wanjuki as they utilize professional matchmakers and the insights of various experts to get to the bottom of their perpetual singledom.
You can read the series’ introductory post of matchmakers see a lot.”Emma Tessler of Dating Ring is the best I’ve ever encountered at gently explaining something the listener isn’t going to like and may even react disastrously to.
I might just be conveying boredom without realizing it?
The idea that my lack of dating success could be a matter of new people misreading my typical level of bored and fidgety is MIND BLOWING.